Bondage technique: Tying your partner to the bed

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When you say the word "bondage," the first thing that springs to many people's minds is the idea of tying a partner down to the bed and having fun. While bondage covers a lot more territory than that, it's a good place to start...and yes, it is a lot of fun.

If you have a bed with bedposts, you're in business. Tying someone spread eagle to the bed can be as simple as attaching a bit of rope to each bed post and then tying the rope to your partner's wrists and ankles, though for safety, comfort, and convenience I generally recommend using cuffs instead of tying the rope directly to your partner's limbs. They're easier to use, and less likely to cut off circulation...remember, if you keep your partner comfortable, you get to play longer!

"But I don't have a four-poster bed!"

But what if you don't have a bed with bedposts? It's difficult to tie someone to the bed without bedposts, right?

Fear not; there are some simple solutions to this problem. You can tie someone to a bed quite easily even if the bed appears to lack anything to affix a rope to. I'll talk about three ways to do that here.

And what do you do once you have your partner tied to the bed? We'll talk about that as well.


The fastest, cheapest way to tie someone to a bed that lacks the convenience of bedposts involves using two lengths of rope, each about 15-30' long, depending on how large your bed is. It's fast, it's simple, and it works with nearly all beds. Here's what you do:

1. Find a couple of wrist cuffs that have D-rings or some other attachment point. Slip the rope through the D-rings. Lay the rope across the mattress so that one end just touches the floor, and decide where you'd like the cuffs to be. Slide the cuffs to the positions where you'd like them, then tie them in place. You'll have a rope with two wrist cuffs tied along it.

2. Lay the rope back across the mattress, about a foot or so from the head of the bed. Take the long end of the rope and pass it underneath the mattress. Bring it back out the other side, and tie it in place. You can use even a simple granny knot to do this. When you're done, you'll have a rope tied completely around the head of the mattress, with two wrist cuffs just where you want them to be.

3. Repeat with the second rope and the ankle cuffs, around the foot of the bed.

By tying the rope all the way around the mattress and tying wrist and ankle cuffs to it, you have a quick, ready-made way to restrain your partner spread eagle on the bed without requiring any fixed part of the bed to tie the restraints to.


Economical and even more convenient. The ready-made under-the-mattress kit is a clever system that consists of long straps made of nylon webbing, which connect beneath the bed to a connector strap that passes around and underneath it. The kit also includes four Velcro cuffs, one for each strap, that connect to the ends of the straps.

This system is not the most secure in the world. With a little patience, a person restrained in this way can probably work free. Using different cuffs that aren't Velcro makes it a bit more secure, but it's probably not the best choice for people who really like secure, hard-core restraint. It's convenient, portable, and comfortable, though, making it a good choice for beginners and intermediate bondage fans.


Pricier but very, very clever and very flexible, the Sportsheets bondage bedsheets are perfect for people who like light bondage and convenience. Essentially, this is a soft, fuzzy fitted sheet that straps to your mattress. It includes four cuffs with "anchor pads"--large Velcro pads that you can attach anywhere to the sheet. This arrangement allows you to secure your partner in just about any position you can imagine.

Like the under-the-bed kit, the bondage bedsheets are not really all that secure; with a bit of effort, a bound person can work free. If hardcore, escape-proof bondage is your scene, these probably won't fill the bill for you, but they're fun and non-threatening, making them a good choice for nervous beginners and people who like a more casual approach to bondage.

So once you've worked out the mechanics of getting your partner tied to the bed, then the fun begins!, why are you looking at me like that? Doesn't everyone have an intuitive sense of what to do with a bound and helpless partner?

Well, don't worry. This stuff is not obvious. If you're looking for ideas, read on!

Now that my partner is tied down... what?

Okay, so now that the mechanics are covered, what do you actually do with a partner who's at your mercy, bound to the bed?

You'll find answers to that question scattered all over this Web site, but for new, let's talk about a few specifics about restraining your partner, about creating a psychological environment, and about what to do with a partner who's tied down and helpless.


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